People have been searching for the Holy Grail for centuries. It takes energy to search for religious relics, so they probably have been eating Holy Crap Cereal for centuries as well.
This cereal looks like it is full of bible verses, and child molestation, however you’ll be happy to learn that it contains neither. In fact this shit is so good it’s all non-gmo and organic.
So why name it Holy Crap Cereal then? Well it’s because when you eat this shit, you get the powers of god himself. We are talking eye lasers, finger lasers, telepathy, ass lasers, and whatever else god can do. Supposedly in order to attain godlike powers you must feast on the droppings of the god you want to embody. So this stuff is full of godshit.
If you have a health conscious neighbor, a new age friend, a catholic priest, or any other devout person in your life, then you need to get them this cereal, so they too can shoot ass lasers. Seriously, this stuff says that it’s “rocket fuel.” Energize your sunday school sessions with Holy Crap Cereal!